And the devil danced.

Do you ever find yourself in a rut?  Like you do everything you can do to be positive and pull yourself out, but the devil just dances.  I’ve been there the last few days.  Here’s where Phil 4:8 comes into play in my daily life.

Recently I shared my husband’s story and our struggle.  I forgave him and worked through it.  But sometimes the devil gets in my ear and he is persistent.  He doesn’t let up.  My husband has been nothing but upstanding.  Especially recently.  I mean he made sure my mother’s day was absolutely perfect, and man it was.  I was blown away at his efforts.  But the devil is there.  He knows when I’m weak, and I’m weak right now.  With the struggles of my kids, their dad, weight issues, juggling it all….I’m weak.  So he’s in my ear…”you know he’s only doing this because he’s hiding something….he’s talking to someone….he’s just trying to hide it from you….you better put your guard up…” And it continues relentlessly.  It literally never stops.  All while my husband is being here for me…sending me sweet messages.  He sent me a post today about how he married the perfect woman.  Yet the devil is trying to convince me he’s just saying that.  He told me I’m beautiful today more than once….the devil whispered “He has done something for him to think that way…” It doesn’t stop.

It literally makes my head spin.  I get so full of anxiety that I’m ready to crack at any moment.  Here’s what’s real….my husband is insanely in love with me.  He’s good to me.  He’s good to my kids.  He stands beside me through all of the ups and downs mostly without complaint.  I mean he’s human, so sometimes he has to throw in his distaste for some things.  He’s been amazingly supportive of my career, my life choices, my fitness goals…all of it.  So why does the devil attack this way?  He attacks because doubt is the number one killer of happiness.  If I doubt my husband, we have issues.  If we have issues, we pull back from our Father.  We fuss and argue and everything falls apart.  So the devil does his dance.

Now you may wonder how in the world do you get past it???  Philippians 4:8.  Whatever is true, honest, just, pure, lovely, kind.  If there is any virtue, if there is anything worthy of praise, think of these things.  The first time I read this verse, I was in a bible study and telling the leader of the study how I would completely freak out about my baby over every little thing.  I wouldn’t let her sleep in her room because I was terrified someone would break in her window and kidnap her.  I constantly kept watch over her and was extremely over protective.  She told me to Philippians 4:8 it.  So I went home and read this verse and thought clearly she is crazy…I can’t just invent things that are good to think of when my baby is in danger of being kidnapped.  This verse doesn’t apply to me at all.  Time went on and I jumped into my bible some more and it hit me like a ton of bricks.  Phil 4:8 doesn’t mean invent something good to think of.  It means look at what’s real.  What’s really happening?!  Could my daughter be kidnapped?  Yes, but not from her bed.  There was a dresser right in front of her window so a kidnapper would have to come through the front door, down the hallway and then get past the dog all while being completely silent as my room was right across from hers.  The devil was dancing.  What’s true is that my husband lives and breathes ME.  He can’t survive without me and I can’t survive without him.  We are connected in a way that is indescribable.  But the devil knows my weakness and tries to steal my joy.

So when my heart is full of anxiety, I focus on this verse.  What is true and just and right?  What’s true is my Father wants me to be happy.  The devil is taking advantage of me when I’m in a tough spot, but my real Daddy is there and if I cling to Him and ask Him to show me what’s real, He will reveal to me and calm my anxiety.  Here’s the thing….everything that you allow to take up space is projected into your life.  If I hold onto all of these negative thoughts about my husband, it breaks our trust and eventually would break us completely.  You have to start to train your mind to see what’s true and if you can’t, ask God to reveal it to you.  I explained to my husband that I was having anxiety, gave him the reasons why, then gave him the opportunity to reassure me that I was just being crazy.  I then asked God to wrap me in His armor so that I could be free from the devil.  It takes practice to perfect this method.  I’m no where near close to perfecting it, but I make an honest effort.  I read a quote this week “Living well starts with thinking well.”  And it’s so true.  I encourage you to give your worries and anxieties to God and Phil 4:8 it.  It works in all aspects of fear and anxiety.

 

In Love,

Mama H